Paw & Order: How to Manage One Dog Stealing from the Other

It’s an age-old question that dog trainers get all the time:

“What do I do about my puppy stealing toys from my other dog?”

As humans, of course we want our dogs to ‘play nice and share.’ What we need to remember is that dog play can look different from dog to dog, and pack to pack; depending on the ages of the dogs, as well as breeds, health, and temperaments.

We must also recognize that in the dog world, possession is 9/10 of the law - meaning even a ‘lower-ranking,’ submissive dog will sometimes guard items from a ‘higher-ranking’, more assertive dog.

Today we got an email from a long-time, repeat client of Front Range K9 Academy (we’ve now had the honor of helping them train 3 wonderful dogs).

In the email, the owners asked about their new, 5 month old shepherd mix stealing toys from their 4 year old shepherd mix.

Like many owners, they were unsure of how much intervention they should be doing.

Their questions included wondering whether it was okay to allow the older dog to warn the puppy off the toy with a growl, or even by snapping.

When the pup did steal a toy, the owners always took it away and gave it back to the older dog. They also were redirecting the puppy, but the pup would often circle back to try again.

Even if the older dog would allow the pup to have the toy, and would choose a different toy, the pup would then fixate on the older dog’s NEW toy, and start the pestering and thievery all over again.

This ‘game’ has gone on long enough that the older dog has had to escalate her warnings from showing her teeth, to growling, and now to snapping at the puppy.

All of this probably sounds very familiar to some of you.

Many owners assume they should just ‘let the dogs work it out.’ But this is NOT the best option, and can lead to some major problems in the future.

Instead, we advise that owners view the dogs and these situations like they would view parenting human children.

<Gasp!> Did I really just type that? Those of you who know me, know that I generally loathe any comparisons of dogs to ‘furkids,’ ‘furbabies', etc. But in this case, the analogy is actually quite fitting.

Sooooo... let's look at this as if the dogs were human kids.  

If one of your children was constantly taking things away from a second child, to the point of the second child getting more and more frustrated and agitated, you wouldn't allow that to continue, right?   

And, you most likely wouldn't leave it up to the second child to discipline the first one, either!

The same rules apply to dogs as kids.  

YOU, the owner/parent need to intervene on the behalf of the dog who is constantly being pestered, or actually losing their toys to the other.

And you should intervene even for the intention of going for the toy, whether or not there is an actual heist. 

You shouldn’t be putting one dog in the position of having to discipline the other. That is your job.  

And that means early intervention - with the pushy dog on a leash or dragline when there are toys out for play. It’s ok to correct the pushy dog - either with the leash, redirection, squirt bottle, etc. - for even thinking about messing with the less assertive dog or her toys at all. 

The correction doesn't have to be harsh - just quick, clear, and concise.  If the pushy dog goes back to the theft, then you must lather, rinse, repeat your correction.

Basically, in the case cited above, the puppy is being a colossal brat (as evidenced by the older dog occasionally picking a different toy, and the pup then going for that new one, too)!  With these two powerful shepherd dogs, we don’t want things to intensify any further, especially as the puppy matures and may be bigger, faster and stronger than the older dog.

As owners, you don’t have to tolerate that bratty-ness, and neither does the older, or more submissive dog! Additionally, don't leave one dog to have to constantly defend herself and her toys. 

Remember, in the dog world, possession is 9/10 of the law, so by encouraging one dog to have to guard her toys and give constant warnings, you're setting the dogs up for conflict in other areas - and possibly even eventual fights - if the pushy pup is not heeding the warnings and the older dog is having to escalate those warnings.

This is no good.

Intervene early and swiftly.  Redirect your pushy pup to appropriate play with you and her own toys; and correct and redirect consistently for even thinking of being a thief.  

Depending on the dogs, sometimes playtime with multiple dogs and toys just isn’t possible. There is just too much value attached to the toys. This is very common with fetch. We never recommend throwing a single toy with multiple dogs around. Their prey drive and enthusiasm to chase will too often override their good sense - leading to dangerous collisions at best, and to fights over the moving toy at worst.

In these circumstances, we recommend using playtime for bonding individually with each dog at separate times. Play is a great way to train and bond all at the same time!

Of course, some dogs actually love to play together with toys - and this is fine. As long as games of any kind between dogs (chase, tug, wrestling, etc.) are balanced and evenly matched - without one dog dominating the play - then let ‘em play!

Need a little help with your puppy or dog? Contact us today! Front Range K9 Academy

Jennifer Hime is the Owner and Training Director of Front Range K9 Academy in Wheat Ridge, CO. She has been training dogs and their owners professionally since 1990.

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